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The one thing I really hate about kids today is how they try to talk with American West Coast accents. And when I say try, I mean fail miserably at to the point of causing their poor parents eternal shame and driving them to point of insanity. The worst thing is, these kids don't even sound remotely anything like an American. I've been alive for some twenty-odd years and have …
Dear whosoever that may chance upon this,In that ever so odd way that the world changes from season to season, I have found that I've changed in my diligence in maintaining this blog. From a once was daily ritual to that now of a monthly. It is to no small surprise that I currently find that I have barely 3 people visiting this squalid journal anymore.But enough about …
While on the bus home the other day, I saw a 7 year old kid playing Grand Theft Auto 3 on his PSP. I don't know why but I felt instantly worried. Wasn't so much worried because he was running over pedestrians like an enraged madman, hauling off drivers from their cars, and machine gunning whores up on Sunset Blvd.Was more worried because at one point of the game, he kept …
I always wondered if people purposely leave a single strip of toilet tissue dangling from its role as some lame justification of not changing the spent roll for a new one. I've always found this really annoying.Of course that has nothing to do with my post title whatsoever. I went to watch Beowulf over the weekend and as a guy, I thought it was a great movie. All except for …
I've always believed that there's a place and a time for everything. And the bus is definitely not the place to spit out all your lovely mouth juices at. I swear that if God gave me a handgun and the license to kill, I'd go on a rampage in an instant.So I'm on the bus to work as usual and in front of me is this 50 something crusty old Chinese guy. I swear that all crusty old …
My forays into Yuppieland are never good. I like to believe that there's a place on this little blue ball that's increasingly becoming bluer thanks to bastards like China, India, and the U.S. of A., for everyone. And one of those place is for yuppies or people I like to know as God's chosen few, and another place for everyone else which I like to know as …
This blogger or once was a blogger (somewhat) has been so thoroughly busy of late that he has been unable to regularly update his blog even if regularly meant once a year or every time Santa Claus hauls fat ass down a chimney. I have, quite frankly and sadly, lost a lot of that drive that once drove me to write here. That drive was mainly defined by the insane amount of free …
... now with red text to denote how a cynic would interpret each sentence.Overheard at a train station.Girl A: Wow hey, I haven't seen you for a long time!Translates to: It's been awhile. Glad to know your life has been keeping you too busy to meet up with your friends and other close one's in your life. When was the last time you called your mother? (Note: An aptly added …
I sincerely believe that all people are born considerate. It's a naive belief but I really do sincerely belief that by nature, every human being on this little ever expanding in blue color thanks to global warming thanks to big corporations who indiscriminately rape our environment and radical fundamentalist Christian protest groups who find it necessary to use non-recycled …
Yes, I'm finally on Facebook. Add me if you can find me. Hint, use my name and look for the picture of White Ninja.Facebook is fun. I learnt that I can still be a complete arsecavity even when on the online world. Roughly 50% of my life is now dedicated to poking people on facebook. Poking is so addictive that I even went to this group called "Lets stop poking and just have …
A horrible realization has just dawned on me. I was at a wedding rehearsal a few hours ago and realized that most of my friends here in Singapore are either getting married or dating / in the process of courtship with the rare exception of individuals like myself. I remember naively coming into this year thinking that I'm finally not the odd one out in the group(s) I hang …
I've heard it many times in many different incarnations, apparently, I'm somehow related to the son-of-darkness or am the son-of-darkness. I know it's a risky proposition saying this but, if I were somehow connected to the evil-one-whose-name-I-shall-not-mention, my life would be a lot simpler. Yes, I'd have to worry about things like turning people on the path of sin but no, …
Dearest neighbours or neighbors depending on which side of the Atlantic's English you prefer,I try my best to be a good neighbour. I am in most cases, a patient, understanding, and in certain cases, a humble man. I don't believe in making outrages or inane demands and to be honest, I rarely make any demands at all. I subscribe to the philosophy of not making a pest of myself …
Every time I hear a young girl say she wants to grow up and become just like Paris Hilton or Lyndsay Lohan, I shudder to imagine exactly how screwed up their future will be. I mean, who seriously wants to grow up following the footsteps of an ex-convict-drug addict-pornstar-repeat DUI offender celebrity? But yet, I suppose young girls, just like hormonally charged young men, …
The question was asked: What do I look for in a future partner?The answer that ran through my head was: My taste in women is so inexplicably bad that the only women I ever seem to fall for seem to be those who either are emotionally unsettled or would never fall for me and that the only suitable partners for me are those who I have absolutely no interest in. In which case, my …
My laptop has a virus and so I won't be posting anything anal today.Instead, I'm going to wish Miss Goodshithappens a happy graduation, congratulations, and all that hoo-hah even though I already wished her all that on MSN in the wee hours of the morning today and then I shall link her blog here so you lot can click on that link or if you're lazy, this link, just so you guys …
Wanted:- Lots of Codeine- A bottle of vodka- 3 cans of beer- 1 bottle of stout- A bottle of pain killers- And a nooseOr- A hugI'm having the lousiest of months. I so need a moment of reprieve.
One of the fun things about being constrained to taking only public transportation when one needs to get somewhere is that it gives one a chance to observe the behavior of other denizens of a country's proud public transportation system. One of the really bitchy things about being constrained to taking public transportation when one needs to get somewhere is that it gives one …
My name is Merv Kwok and I am legendarily bad with directions. Not only am I lengendarily bad with directions, I'm legendarily bad at giving directions. Today, two Indian tourist asked me how to get to a popular shopping center in Singapore.Blur as I was, I pointed them in a direction that was totally opposite direction of where they wanted to go. It's a good thing there was …
Before I begin my rant, here's a little background on the movie title for those who are unfamiliar with Christian lore and traditions. Babel, which is the movie title to all the wisecracks who haven't figured that out, is a reference to the story of the Tower of Babel found in the Bible.In that story, a group of people decide to smack together this really kickass tower called …
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