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selamat hari raya :)
there are images of abang pop out through my minds once a while. and it keeps popping out , now that eid is nearer. ya rabb, i am deeply sorry for the feeling i have. i just miss having him around. the fact that everyone else is preparing for raya and I felt bad cause there's no him anymore, hurt.even the smallest things like buying drinking water for the family every raya makes us smile and lost in our thoughts. the small blinking bulbs above the sliding door that he'll on every ramadhan, the garbage that been tossed out or just the noises he made on every single things . and this pierce feelings I have keep deepen as i look through the hall, as i smell his perfumes once a while,as i felt his presence and as i think of it more and more. and am sorry for not being pleased, I know that I have to accept everything that have been decided for me, for my family. still, I dont want to have this memories to disappears but i know it will. and it hurt. it hurt. it just hurts and i dont know what else. thruth to be
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